♥

This year i got my christmaspresent early, on the 23th december. Around 9 in the morning we were sitting in a landrover, dressed in enourmous(/-ly warm) jumpsuits and riding direction darkness with Svalbard Husky, which was recomended by a finnish friend and everything she said to be pleasant, was indeed so. We arrived in a dogyard like so many here. There was a reindeer outside the fence, my first one to see.

The alaskan husky is so very friendly: our guide told us, that these dogs were historically the ones who would keep the babies warm during colder days, meaning that only the friendly, calm ones could survive.

As the dogs were chosen, we had to get them ourselves and put them infront of the sledge.It was not easy in the cold and we had to take our gloves off in this freezing weather to attach everything safetly. The leading dogs were the first. We had a boy and a girl in the front, and this guy was trying to pee on me, when that didn't work out, he thought he'll just lean on the lady instead. But it was so much fun. We got to know the names of the dogs and a bit about their charakter. And then ... into the darkness we went!

The dogs were so beautiful, it's sad i can't photograph in the dark yet and the flashlight kind of makes everythig fall flat. 

After we got back we got every dog back to its place and feed all the 50 dogs, then enjoyed some aurora lights, that were unusally red and yellow on tuesday. And after that we were again in the landrover driving back to town, where we were still in deep awe for the whole day. 

There was this momend during the ride, when we switched our headlamps off. We were moving through time and space and yet it felt we were not moving at all, everything just felt like a blanket was being laid over us. Forgetting the existance of time and only taking in this enourmous space of endlessness. Scary and majestic. 

♥

This photo is taken 9 am. In case you wondered :)

As im browsing through an estonian ebook-shop in the section of foreign classics, i see a lot of Cartland next and between some Dostojevski, Gogol, Rilke and Fizgerald, Bacon. When did that happen? And it makes me wonder if i should buy one of Cartlands ebooks? But the pink exterior with the flowers and old pin-up-like photographs kind of make it look like a toothache.

It's 3am in my hometown and here i am wide awake. For some days (weeks) i have developed this medieval habit of waking up in the middle of the night. I have my continuing zombie-moments. 

Recently i sent out our weddingphotoswebsite and included some polarnight impressions, very minimal though, but the responses were theremore amuzing. Anwsers kept coming with the content: thought we have the sun, it's not that bright, its actually really-really dark here too.

M, who's been here for couple of years, says that when she goes home in november she's just so happy to see the sun rise every morning, that rain, clouds, mud and anything-everything else seems actually like decoration. I guess it's not something easy to comprehend and i think those responses were meant to cheer us up. And, well, they did. In a odd way, but they did.

Maybe it's likewise as in paintings, when you want to give the impression of darkness you add a little light somewhere and vice versa. So the gray-dark winter is much harder to endure perhaps?

Mørketide or dark season is here actually dark, i mean, like night, like really, honestly. Even people coming from Tromsø are surprised by it, altho they also have this mørketide they "celebrate", still on midday some sunrays reach that northern city of norway. But not here. Not this town.

So while we have not seen the sun, at the moment for almost two months now, we wait patiently and calmly, cuddle up in warmth and take in every source of light with the utmost delight ;) that way we survive, longing quietly for the sunrise, that awaits us here in February.

Sweet hugs and merry holidays!

♥

People are mean. They are, in an unknowing way. Like myself, when with an odd feeling i discover, that ten sentences ago i might insulted the person im talking with, or at least tapped on an old wound. A feeling of bit guilt and anticipation. There isn't room for an apology, that would seem weird, oddly personal and out of the blue. Ignoring and continuing is the way. We say sorry only when we really meant to hurt someone, it seems. ?

Our mouths are the sliding doors of the night metro: who knows what'll jump out of there.

It's been a week of "great plans" and "nothing much". The worst and the best in one. It's not that bad, as i look at my calendar and the crossed out to-do-list, but it's the feeling. We've been a bit sad i guess. We know we'll stay here for christmas, and we know that everyone we know here, will not.

I guess i doesn't matter that much. We'll get over it. 

Yesterday night was a great snowstorm. Constant howling for days. It's over now and i can hear one of the neigbours showeling snow. At midnight.

♥

This is not how it looks like here right now. It's still dark.It's taken in november.

The wind is back, with the speed of 20 meters per second and so it'll be for 3 days. Luckly the wind is not freezing cold as it would be if it'll be more humid. Down in the centre of the town it's not so bad, but in front of our house it does take ones breath away. But it's kind of fun too, sometimes.

Someone asked once about the houses here, as what are they made of, so i'll share as much as i know now about that. All the houses here (with the exeption of Huset) are built from wood, brought from mainland. In this arctic desert firefightingmanagement is therefore very important. The buildings have no cellar, they are standing on wooden poles that go into the permafrost, 5 to 6 meters it was, if i remember correctly. Thats why in a case of strong wind the houses sving along. It's something you rather feel than see. And when lying in bed at night feeling the house move, is okay for you, i guess living here is no problem :)

Huset (in english "house") is the only stonebuilding in town. It's like The House. Store Norske build it for three years and it is the only house with a cellar, and to be more precise, with a wine cellar since the '80s. It was opened in 1951 and had been from restaurant and school to postoffice with a busstop to emergency hospital and movie theater. Now it's the place of a fancy restaurant and the most nordic night club in the world. Nearly all of the concerts they have here take likewise place in Huset. It's located a bit furhter away from the centercity, near Nybyen, i think most of the income of the taxidrivers comes here from driving to the airport and driving from Huset at night :)

♥

All written is fiction. But what is fiction? An attempt to catch the uncatchable. Or just a touch of it's sleeve as it passes us by.

I guess i read it somewhere.
 The days go fast. Very quicly. And it's dark. Somehow it feels like our motions have become more slow and that's why it feels like time is passing in speed. Peole worried we're bored out here... but there is not really time for that. As there is no sun, there is the clock and the goals that are set for oneself. Plenty to do. 

Last sunday in a gathering people were talking about sunny vacations and then i missed it. The sun. But here the locals say, that they like the dark season more - much more - than the light one. Well, coffee works more effectively than lavender :)
It's easier to get energy, than to slow down, when the sun is beaming on you 24/7, they say.

Also the people working in the kindergarden are the best: every week they have some special event. Love that they actually explaned two-yearolds how the planets are and why it's dark now, like accurately. Just sweet. 

♥

Although the sun doesn't rise above the horizon now, the sunbeams still reached us today. It has been days since we had a clear sky and with a promise for some northern lights. it was unusual, since we're already used to the dark mornings. When in the afternoon it got dark, then of course  it started to snow... and later there were still some clouds. But. I saw them. Aurora lights, first time ever.

♥

Today is the last day of the sun. The last glimpse of light. The weather is nice, it's soft and snowy. The kids have a big fest in the kindergarden, with lights and music. I wish i had also a place to got to.... does sushi in the Arktic sound weird? I really don't know anymore :)

 

 Photos from August 2014 in Karula nationalpark

♥

 Under strict supervision..

a cake was promised to be made. it did.

A present for dad: local handmade chocolate 

the heart in the middle said: verdens beste pappa. true-true.

I guess this is it with the nice outdoor photos for a while... for a couple of months, unless we get to see some aurora action, but exept for that... some moonlight maybe too ... if i can figure out how on earth this camera should work in complete darkness, yes, other than that, it's indoor only, and on auto-mode and fuzzy. Yey! 

Good monday and drink less coffee :)

Bisous!

♥

Almost finished the book of Haruki Murakami, who turns out to be a marathon runner and a triathlon athlete ("participant" would sound like an understatement). "What i talk about, when i talk about running" is a quite funny book, but i don't want to give anything away, since it's a book nice to read when you're interested in writing novels or/and running, but if both subjects leave you cold, then... leave it. This reminded me of John von Düffel, antoher bestseller author, who's also a runner and a swimmer. A healthy body needs a healthy mind. Or was it the other way around? Probably. In Nantes we watched a documentary about Düffel and how he's writing his bestseller: "Houwelandt– Ein Roman entsteht". The insight was much revealing of the reality how a novel finds its way to the world. And there was a lot of running involved aswell.

Then im knitting a sweater and already thinking of the design of another sweater, but since here they are not wasted... knit on! 

When i ask someone about the dark season, a word i hear is most often is "cozy". Candles, sweets, books, baking, carols ... i start to feel christmasy.

Oh, and we bought a car. Since we bought it in the polar night, we don't really know the color of it.

It's grey. As in the picture, that was shown to us. It is the same car. Bought it through fb.

Hope you smirked. 

I did.

Wishing you a pleasant weekend! 

Don't forget your dad this sunday, when you have one ;)

Bisous!

♥

Hei! Hello!
Hi! Shouldn't you not be here?

Taken out of context, isn't it strange. Didn't you move?/Shouldn't you be somewhere far away? Seconds later my apologetic rush would kick in and i would start telling how my husband came for work, how we came along to visit family, how it's only for two weeks. Feeling like the object of "What's wrong in this picture" section. 

So, home, where are you?

It's not where it used to be. And it's not quite here yet. But, as we drove back up Sukkertoppen from the airport, Juss said "our Svalbard" and invited our local friend D over to visit us in "our Svalbard". It was funny, sweet and somewhat surprising. He picked it up from all the invitations we have made to familymembers and friends. And he must have felt homesick too. 

I realize that i write in questions. That's how i start. There are topics i'm not sure about, not sure what to think of them, wanting to lean to all directions before finding the balance somewhere in between, or on a side, who knows. It unfolds best in a conversation, like a dance, like improvisation with a partner who catches the impuls and follows it further to return something new and see where it goes from there. 

I miss questions. In a world of statements, where a question easily becomes critisism or a sign of ignorance. I question myself.

♥

August '14 @karula

Some photos from August. Recently the camera is something that is just weight in my bag, since i hardly get the chance to take it out.

We've been out there for five weeks before coming back for two weeks for Martins job. He's working and me and the boys hang out with friends and family. It's been pretty nice, exept that im down with a cold, but i keep up, no matter :)

Now, thinking: five weeks. When we arrived it was amazement, we walked around eyes wide open and a grin. The first week the mountains looked two dimensional, and i felt not really there yet, as if they had forgotten some of my mind in Tromso while getting off and on the same plane. Thats when i learned that having less handluggage (items) is a lot better, when with kids.

The second week i remember walking down the road and calling my friend and being utterly saticfied. Im in the freaking Artic and im having a conversation with someone close - how cool is that.

On the third one Martin was on sea and that was a hard week. As it was my first time with two kids alone, it came too quikcly in an unknown environment. The weather played a role, as going outside was  tricky, because of the storm. And here i do have a elaborate supportsystem of people and places. There it was just the livingroom for most of the time. But it was tough on Martin too, i think. We did our best. Therefore the fourth week we just recovered and then started kindergarten... 

... and as soon as we arrived in Tallinn my body said: dear, we're home, let it all out. Thus soar throat and a blocked nose.

When we go back it'll be the beginning of the dark season. Interesting. How will we manage? But in other aspects we are kind of returning home. It's an interesting flip i didn't think of. I'm with the kids on vacation, as strange as it sounds. 

We're like crazy here with food, eating at least one red onion a day and  greens, reds, yellow in between!

Have a good week! See you around!

♥

 We went up..

 and came down :)

 "This is too small"

 yum-yum-yum

 The cakes were super delicious

Little firefighter!

uhm, why do photos get so fuzzy here??
Have a good sunday!
Bisous!

♥

 Have you ever seen a streetlight wave like a birch tree-top in the wind?

Martin was at sea from Monday morning until Sunday afternoon. With no phoneconnection or internet. "No news - good news". It was a rough week. My first time being alone with two. The boys got sick just before the trip and we had some real windstorm in the middle of the week and were therefore trapped indoors for days. Luckly there were good moments, conversations too. Im amazed how good people cook here. Lifesavers.

Last week i got a new habbit. After the boys are asleep i usually wake up, since i must fall asleep in the most uncomfortable position, sneak upstairs and make some good night tea that was amongst the stuff we got from someone who just moved away from here last week. It reminded me of the stuff we left behind and gave away, from cocoa to salt and everything in between. Some of the things were even exactly the same. It really is "what goes around, comes around". So i'd be siting on the couch, dinrking tea, reading something in the internet, because a book would have made me too lonely. And the feeling of being somewhat connected to the world was essential. The wind was scary. Scary as in "this house is going to be blown off this island" and "will the ship be okay?". While the day was just managing emotions and being strong, capable, doing what has to be done, the nights were to be: freaking frightened (:

I can laugh abou it now, since my seaman is home, safe and sound.

 I think if you, in this blog: me, are in a new environment alone you first take it in. Im not sure how to explane it. It's like you are a tape on pause, because different music is playing. Or better, you are the new bassist of a band, first you listen, catch the beat and then later, you open up and improvise, your color comes out. The beginning is a great bit timid. Because there are too many jokes about bassist anyway.

I'm just not that person to walk in a room and dance a solo, while sparkling confetti falls from the ceiling. But i wish i was. 

I do confetti, but it's in my pocket.

:) 

Have a colorful week!

♥

This guy is awesome. And the stories he tells. You're an awesome dude, Juss!

♥

 Good morning! 

 Somewhere Sukkertoppen...

 not in the best mood, can happen (:

 cotton-like thing growing and glowing

 That way...

and the other way.

Tonights amazement: a rainbow -something very rare here- in the evening.

there was the whole thing, but my camera just didn't focus when i pointed it towards the sky.

Martin is doing fieldwork and i'm doing the rest ;)

Working towards a sweet Sunday! Can do. 

Bisous!

I'll leave some mood-music here as well 

   

.

♥

There was a little debate in my head about the language here, but in the end i decided, that since the two readers of my blog have one in common - english- i'll stick to that. Well, and i did learn a new english word today: gale. 16m/s  wind is near gale apparently. Nice. But the wheater has been good to us really. As we met people who moved here from India in november, i think we are totally being pampered. We have night and day and also similar conditions like at home in some rougher winter/spring-times.

I think about what to write and it always changes in the end. I have this idea for a post and when i actually get to write one: the paper is blank. There is this fear of white paper, a condition of artist and poets. Sometimes i'll be thinking about similar things. How weird. How interesting. How intriguing. Would be the things i'd think then, but nothing more specific, since time seems to be too precious to waste it on... well.. thinking(figuring) something out.

By Lot Madeleine

I like it here. Especially on weekends.

♥

Last Sunday we didn't really get to the top of Sugartop-mountain Sukkertoppen, but almost. Sometimes I still can't believe, that the view outside isn't a wallpaper. Our gaze is drawn to every white, blue mountain on the horizon. 
Im yet too tired to write, but i'll get around to it. There's just been too much hassle about sending stuff from home, that it's exhausting. Oh, well, just baked some white bread and head to sleep. Good night!

♥

Hello, World! 
I thought i start with some bad quality photos, just to show some improvement later :)

♥

It's 23pm and i'm obviously ...cooking jam. Miki is asleep, like Martin and Juss, who instead of the bed, are sleeping in the winter-garden, by accident. Interesting. They wanted to wait/play there until i put Miki to bed, but ended up asleep on the orange couch.

I'm gonna miss this apartment, although it's full of flaws (like last renovation was in the 90es), it has been a great two years and these walls here know it. We love the garden and foremost our neighbours. Living here has made me see how nice it is to have a small community and that they actually work. 

Last friday we had a nice brunch outside the town at our friends place. We stayed until the late afternoon. They have a big garden and a sandbox, that way the kids were entertained and we could just relax. And truth be told: it was flattering and exiting to have someone photograph me and us for a change, since 90% of all our jpg-fails don't include me, because i'm the one taking them and it's either me with the kids or Martin with the kids. Now we have some fails i think i'll even print. Yey.